It seems like ages since we last talked. I have tried several times to sit down and write this blog, but have ended up crying each time. We had to put Annie to sleep last week. Some of you have met her. She was a lab and my best friend. I had her before I met Jake.
I took her to the vet on Monday and found out she was full of cancer. I was alone so I took her home. I cried all day waiting for Jake. He took the next day off to work and we took her back to the doctor. I held her while …………. she…..ah…..passed. Still, the thought of what happened brings tears to my eyes. The doctor gave me the choice to either sit with her or they would do it in the back. As hard as it was to hold her in my arms, I wanted to be there for her. She has always been there for me……Always.
A guy at work said, “It’s just a dog why are you crying?” Just a dog!? I never really thought of her a “just a dog”. She was a friend. Someone I told my deepest darkest secrets to and she never spread them to anyone else. She loved doing laundry! In the city, we would do the Laundromat together. There was an ice cream store next to the Laundromat….we would get the single scoop ice cream she in a dish and I in a cone. We would sit on the steps of the Laundromat watching people go by while our clothes washed. We would take off and go for long walks and drives on my day off. She had her pillow on the bed and I had mine. Although, she didn’t like to sleep there…..I think she was too hot but being a polite friend she never complained, just got up after I went to sleep and slept on the floor by me. She fell in love with Jake at first sight. When he came to the door, he immediately let her sniff him and spent more time fussing over her than me! He would always bring her a treat or toy when he came to pick me up….. he realized the way to my heart was through my protector…Annie.
I asked Mary, if there were animals in heaven? She said, “yes the bible tells us, the lion and the lamb lay down together”. I have been talking a lot to God this week, begging Him to take care of her, begging Him to have someone fun for her until I get there. I’ve pleaded with him to let me see her again and to let her know I miss her desperately. She was the best friend a girl could have.
For now, today, this second, I’m trusting Mary that I will get to see her again. I’m trusting God He can take care of her the way she likes……but…. just barely.